After Work Drinks

There is one vital guideline to adhere to when partaking in after work drinks -- one rule which will spare you great discomfort and potential disaster. As we all know, there are few slopes more slippery than the "One Drink, Two Drinks, Three Drinks, Sure Let's Have Another Trail." There's sharks in them thar waters, because nothing tastes better after a nice tall beer than -- yep -- another tall beer.

The rule is so simple and obvious it's probably not worth mentioning, but I broke it last night, so let me say it again: eat something, fool. A steak, a sandwich, hell, even a slice of pizza. But eat something, for the love of all that is bright and shiny and good. Otherwise, you run the risk of becoming THAT GUY. The one who can't seem to stand without swaying. The one uttering sheer nonsense everytime he opens his big, beer swilling yap.

Nobody wants to be that guy.

Vacation

Everyone needs a vacation.

The protesters marching in the streets of New York today need a vacation. The cops walking the barriers keeping it orderly need one as well.

Our troops fighting in Iraq sure need a break, and the insurgents should probably give their eyes a rest. All that squinting in the dark, wiring together IED's must be taking a toll on their mental health and well being.

Once upon a time, I suppose, mankind didn't take vacations. There was only the struggle to survive: Track the Woolly Mammoth, kill it, bring it home, start the fire, feed the kids, repeat.

But these days, caught in the grips of perverse modernism, filled with existential angst, over-stimulated and so fatigued we can't sleep without narcotic assistance, we need to get away once in a while. To recharge our batteries, and remind ourselves of just why it is that we get up every day. To remember what it feels like to laugh and enjoy ourselves, and what is really important.

It's strange that we literally need to forget who we are in order to be happy.